My need for Fellowship.

I just got done watching the mother's day service from Impact Church. That is the church that James and I went to just before we moved to Alaska. I was debating if I should watch it or not because James and I only get so much internet per month and if we go over we have to pay more. So I'm always watching how much we are using. Well I figured it would be okay for me to watch since we had about half our internet usage left. I'm glad that I watched it. I needed the connection with "people". Even though I had to watch it online two days later, it was still nice hearing God's word. I haven't been to church in about a month.

Right before James and I went to Anchorage a month ago, he found out his schedule at work was changing. When we got back from town he worked his last Monday -Thursday. And then that Sunday he started his new schedule of Sunday - Wednesday.  Before James' schedule changed we would walk to church. It was about a 35-40 minute walk from our apartment. I'm not comfortable walking that far alone and James also doesn't like the idea of me walking that far by myself. I hope and pray that James and I can find a car soon so I will be able to go to church. I need the fellowship. I need to see people. I'm at home all day by myself for four days. And then I'm with James the other three days. Don't get me wrong I love my husband and I enjoy my time with him, but I just need to meet other people. I need to make friends.

Yesterday I was watching Facing the Giants. I've seen the movie a few time. But yesterday as I was watching it. I was realizing my fears in life. My fear of am I ever going to get pregnant, are James and I ever going to be able to go to church together again. Will I be able to get to go to church and be in fellowship with other believers. I also realize that I haven't been reading my Bible like I'm suppose to. I haven't been praying like I use to. Every now and then right before I go to sleep if something pops in my head I'll pray for that person or need. But I haven't been "faithful" in my prayer life or even my walk with the Lord. Yes I believe He is there and that He loves me. I'm just in a rut. I tell myself that I need to read my Bible and get back on the right track with God. But stuff always comes up. I'm always making excuses.

I want to try and get back to reading my Bible and grow in my faith in God. So if you are reading this, all I ask if you can pray that I can get back on the right track.

Comments

  1. Christina KosbarMay 15, 2012 at 9:39 AM

    i am praying for you i think you should maybe call the church you where going to and see if someone there might be willing to take you to church and that way you can meet some people in the church and get the fellowship you are looking for.
    love you
    Christina kosbar

    ReplyDelete
  2. LynnMay 15, 2012 at 9:47 AM

    Becky I Love you,however God loves you more!!! You and I are in the same rut. So I will make a deal with you.... I'll pray for you and you pray for me...except the part of getting pregnant :-)

    ReplyDelete

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